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It seemed practically settled, then. The only logical next step would to be was call her and ask if it would be alright, despite Teddy's reassurance that it would be. Natalie couldn't help the way she continued to smile at the idea. It was sweet of her for how she apparently spoke of the trainer.
And although an agreement was made, there was pressure against her lips before the lawyer even made an attempt to reach for her phone. It was welcomed, though. The arm around Teddy's waist instinctively tightened, pulling her counterpart completely against herself with little intention of letting go again so quickly.
Agreement came too easily, and Natalie didn't realize how overwhelming the thought could be, especially as Teddy answered her question. From the very beginning. It definitely wasn't the answer the trainer expected, but she didn't hold it negatively. Though it made her wonder what sort of person Teddy's best friend was. She'd meet her soon enough.
And apparently she knew everything about the lawyer's feelings for her. That was enough to steal the air from her lungs. She wanted to kiss her again already. Natalie had yet to tell her own best friend the details of Teddy - let alone how she felt about the lawyer. "I'm looking forward to meeting her." She confirmed with a nod. "Should you call?"
Surprise immediately filtered into Natalie's expression. When asking how long she had with the lawyer, she was glad to hear she could keep her for a few hours. Now that dynamic change, and Natalie certainly wasn't complaining. Her first thought was to ask if she was sure to be okay, but that was quickly remedied with Teddy's latter statement.
She had to kiss her for that.
"If you're sure it'll be okay." Natalie said finally. "What have you told her about me?"
A hand on her shoulder took fabric like it was hers to do so, and it absolutely was. Anything the lawyer might have wanted from her, Natalie would happily give. The magnetic pull Teddy naturally carried inched her just a little bit closer; the tip of her nose brushed against hers as she closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying the mere proximity they lingered in.
The curve of her mouth must have given away the pleasant surprise towards the answer she was given. She had no idea how long she could keep such wonderful company, and to be granted a few hours was more than she was expecting. "Lucky me." She replied, her other hand reaching out to wrap around her waist.
All it took was a little bit of contact, and the lawyer was drawing herself closer. Natalie was glad to see the space left between them slowly begin to disappear. Their time was limited, and she didn't want to spend what was left of it far from her counterpart. "You're welcome to visit any time," she replied. The trainer doubted there would be a moment that - if Teddy were to show up, announced or not - she would find herself disappointed.
Her hand slowly traveled down to behind Teddy's neck. "How long do I have you for?" She asked, voice dropping a little lower.
She was so kind. Thoughtful to listen as a friend, beyond whatever undefined status their relationship was. She smiled with genuine appreciation at the lawyer, truly believing the words she offered. There was comfort in that. "You're wonderful." She offered easily, favoring the word to describe the woman. Taking a step forward, Natalie broke through the distance she created, though only enough to extend a long arm out to her. Fingertips brushed along the length of her jaw, palm settling on the side of her face. She couldn't help but to be drawn to her, even with the smallest of contact.
"And here's my office." She offered with gentle humor, belayed as it was considering they had been standing there for a bit now.
It was there that Natalie supposed she found strength in having a little power herself; often, the trainer considered herself relatively neutral, but her efforts to try and fix something were bringing her in circles - ones that she'd likely continue running in were it not for the thoughtful conversation Teddy was willing to have with her. Allowing that power to shift and let the fate of her friendship with Lena fall into the dancer's hands sounded daunting. Maybe that was an answer within itself.
"Thank you," she said, genuinely. "I'm sure you didn't come all this way to talk about this of all things." She let out a light, humored breath at the thought.
It made perfect sense that the lawyer would know what questions to ask to keep pressing forward. As uncomfortable as a hard conversation could be, Natalie couldn't help but to offer a response to every one that asked of her. Though, admittedly, it was growing more difficult to consider. If only because it was beginning to make her lose hope in the old friendship she wished to restore.
"I don't know." She replied honestly, wishing she could offer something better by way of an answer.
Though Natalie couldn't imagine cutting ties with someone because she didn't need anything from their connection, it felt odd to voice it aloud. Her tongue ran across slightly parted lips, unsure where to really move forward after a statement like that, so she gave a little hum instead, nodding her head. "I've just known her for years, so losing her friendship over something like this is just... hard."
Natalie sucked in a breath. "I think I want - need - to feel considered for."
At the first sign of distance, Natalie's eyes immediately moved to the lawyer, like she might have said a little too much or something wrong. Worry began to fill her features until her gaze fell on that smile.
Only then did her expression turn towards thought. Or confusion. Eyebrows knitted together as she searched for an answer. After a few moments, she realized the one she settled for was more of a surprise than she realized.
How they managed to get on the subject of Lena and stay there was somewhat beyond Natalie. In all honesty, she tried not to think about it often, if only for the strain it put in her chest. Familiar touches from her counterpart did well to counterbalance those feelings, though. Sweet words brought a little smile to her lips, because she had missed the lawyer in those days apart, and there was comfort in knowing that they were feelings shared.
But questions asked deserved her attention, and she kept her gaze off of the lawyer - like she couldn't bring herself to make eye contact while talking about a past specific relation, minor or not. "I have - I mean, I've tried." Her lips pursed to one side. "It's not her fault. I think our perspectives are struggling to line up." As easy as it would have been to hold it against the dancer, Natalie couldn't bring herself to.
A word used to describe her feelings made the trainer's eyes go wide. She wasn't sure if she would call herself bitter over the idea, but a teasing tone took away the heaviness of it, as did the way Teddy eased herself in closer. Naturally, Natalie followed her movements, a hand pressing lightly to the lawyer's shoulder. Fingertips brushed along the expensive fabric as she shook her head before words could even find her.
"I thought I did - I mean, I wanted things to fall back to how they had used to be as friends." Her lips pressed together; she didn't want to hold anything against her former friend. "But it's like that idea that I can't be myself around her, or like I'm letting her down because I can't be what she wants."
Of course Teddy would say that. She was perfectly affectionate in her response, and Natalie sucked in a small breath, holding on to it as she squeezed the hand that had originally taken her own. She was lucky to be in the company of the lawyer.
When Lena was brought up, Natalie shook her head a little. It was admittedly still hard to see the dancer during her usual yoga classes; things had yet to mend. "I don't know if she even knows what she's looking for." Her shoulders rose and fell with a shrug. "You're different though."
Natalie took no issue with any question that Teddy threw her way, and she oaused with the one that was currently offered to her, giving it the thought it truly deserved. That she deserved. Because she wondered if it could so simply be defined by gender, despite how obvious it was now which she was attracted to.
"Yes, to an extent." She answered honestly. "With men, there was always a kind of authority that came with gender, no matter how outdated those thoughts are. "I felt as if I had to try and shape myself to their needs, and I was never comfortable with doing that."
She glanced away, eyes falling on a succulent that lived in her window. "You, on the other hand, make it so easy. I'm just me." Slowly, a smile began to play about her lips. "But I also am aware not all women are like you, either."
Her gaze cast down to the photo briefly. She recalled how her father struggled with the timer on his camera in order to get the shot, but it came out perfect in its own way. She smiled a little before setting it down back on her desk, eyes drawing back towards the lawyer. There was relief in knowing that there wasn't an issue with being new to not just her own realization, but to finding closeness with another person. Given their age, there should have been somebody by now.
"A few months," she denoted, after a little bit of thought. She couldn't deny her an honest answer now by any means. "I often found it hard to connect." And she wondered now if that would have changed had she started paying attention to her own gender rather than the opposite.
